


Scared of Your Love

by calie15



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV), Captain America (Movies), Marvel (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Developing Relationship, F/M, First Kiss, Fluff, Fluff and Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-03
Updated: 2014-06-03
Packaged: 2018-02-03 05:54:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,280
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1733516
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/calie15/pseuds/calie15
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bucky is scared of what he feels for Jemma, and scared of how she might react.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Scared of Your Love

"Why do you put up with me?"

Jemma stopped her work and looked up to Bucky. "What?" She asked with a small laugh.

"I'm not always the most reasonable, I have a loose trigger finger, a sketchy past, and this." He raised his cybernetic arm and held out his hand.

"Stop," she reprimanded and settled her hand over the forearm of his left arm and pushed it down. "We're waiting on Fitz to check the damage don't make it worse." Then she went back to cleaning his wounds.

Bucky knew his arm wasn't that bad, but he let her fuss. "Jemma..."

She frowned at his insistence. "So you're a bit of a mess sometimes, that doesn't mean there is anything wrong with you. You're still a good person."

"I don't feel like a person sometimes," he admitted, hating how pathetic he sounded. That monster still lurks below the surface, even my body isn't completely human."

"Bucky," she began and raised a hand to settle it on his chest where skin ended and metal began, "none of that bothers me."

"Are you sure?" He asked this time, his heart pounding in his chest.

"Of course," she said gently and smiled up at him softly. His hand came up where hers rested, his cybernetic hand. Jemma watched him hesitate with it hovering above her own and she swallowed, realizing suddenly that they were crossing a line. "It's okay," she reassured him.

Bucky hated the fear he felt. It wasn't the fear of a fight, of dying, it was the fear of her rejection. It made him feel weak, small. He couldn't feel her hand beneath his, but he needed to do it anyway. Holding it gently he lifted it from his chest and raised it so that he could press his lips to the inside of her palm, and he waited.

If possible, her heart stopped at the gesture, and she stared up at him with an emotion that had to look like pain. It hurt to see him so hesitant with her as he showed affection. Jemma cupped his jaw and slid her thumb over his cheek, feeling stubble beneath her thumb. She stepped closer between his legs lowered her tools to the table. Gently, she slid a hand up his real arm and rested it on his shoulder.

Bucky let her initiate the kiss, because he wasn't sure if he could. Her lips were hesitant at first, as were his own. She arched her head higher, lips becoming braver, faster, her hands gripped his shoulders tighter. When her hand slipped into his hair and she raised onto her toes something broke free within him and he pushed off the the table, bumping her body slightly. He towered over her even more, but Bucky grabbed her hips and pulled her around, and lifting her onto the table he had just vacated.

Jemma released a breathless laugh as he lifted her into the air, and then she brought her arms around his shoulders. When he stepped between her legs and stood closer she sobered. 

"If it's to much..." Because it had to be, Jemma wouldn't want him, not him.

"No," she whispered and pulled him closer. Their lips met quickly and she kept him close, slid her hands over his shoulders and then his back, feeling the seams of his shoulder beneath her fingers. His arms went to her waist and slid her closer to him. His skin was soft beneath her fingers tips, and muscles firm, shifting beneath her touch. Jemma trailed her fingertips down each ridge in his back, shoulders, arms. It only took her a moment as she grabbed both arms to realize that the muscles in them were identical. It was a clinical observation that she quickly forgot as he slid a hand beneath the back of her shirt. 

Bucky pulled his mouth from her and trailed it down her chin, then her neck. He tightened his arm around her waist and slid a hand into her hair, tilting her head back as he made his way down the column of her throat. Her head tipped back and her legs wrapped around his waist. Blunt nails dug into his shoulders and he scrapped his teeth over her skin.

Jemma felt something stirring within her, need and urges that were not really appropriate for a lab. Already she could feel wetness between her legs. If she didn't stop him she'd be begging him to take her there. "Bucky," she gasped and slid her hands into his hair, "we're in the lab."

It was like cold water, but it stopped him. His entire body tensed under the realization of what he was doing and the feel of his growing erection. With a sigh he dropped his head into her neck. 

Jemma chuckled lightly and pulled her legs from the body they had claimed, but she didn't release him from her arms. "Why did you ask me earlier why I put up with you?"

Bucky pulled away and looked down at her, hesitant to explain, but she'd asked and he was reluctant to refuse. "For this reason. Nice, smart women have better things to do then put up with emotionally scared, brainwashed assassins."

"Who is almost seventy-five years her senior," Jemma quipped. His lips lifted slightly, but it wasn't the smile she had hoped for. "But," she slid her hand down his chest, "you look very young for your age." 

Her hand ended at his pants where she curled her fingers into them. "Jemma..." He warned and wrapped his hand around her wrist to pull her hand away, because the thought of her undoing them was to much. She smiled up at him, and maybe it didn't help everything, but seeing her look happy, joking with him, it made him feel like she might just not see him as a disaster with baggage.

Slowly, her smile slipped from playful to sad, and she raised her hand to his cheek. His hand fell away from her wrist. "Bucky, I'm not blind, I know everything about you. You're not the Winter Soldier."

He tensed at the name, but did nothing else.

"And maybe you aren't the old Bucky Barnes either, but that doesn't mean you aren't a good person and that someone couldn't care for you. I care about you, a lot. If you didn't feel the same way I can promise you it would hurt me."

Her entire admission made him feel as if his heart was being squeezed. Acceptance from her, confirmation that he wasn't fucked up or bad, it meant to much for her to understand. For her just to suggest that he might hurt her feelings because he didn't care enough was all he needed to spur himself into action. He slid his right hand into her hair and pressed his forehead against hers. "I can promise you, I've never felt like this for anyone." And he hoped he wouldn't again. Bucky couldn't fathom there being anyone else like Jemma in his life. He didn't want anyone else.

For a moment Jemma thought her hands might shake. Bucky was serious, and there was so much intent in his face that she wasn't sure how to respond at first. "So I guess this is an official thing now right?" 

"You don't have to convince me," he said and she smiled. It was so real, so genuine, so innocent, that he knew he was seriously fucked. He'd fall in love with her in the end and it would probably be the greatest nerve wracking thing he ever did, but Bucky didn't care, because he just leaned in and kissed her again.


End file.
